Typing Papers with Grace

I have been listening to the Toby Mac song "Speak Life" a lot lately. The line that keeps catching my attention is "it is hard to imagine the words from my mouth as Your arms of compassion." Oh how I want that to be true!!!

Imagine this: This morning at 7:00 am one of my kids asked me if I had typed their paper. I said "No, honey, you never gave it to me yesterday, nor did you ask me to type it. But strangely enough, I got up early this morning and have everything ready for. the morning. Since God cleared my schedule, I have time to type it before you leave for school at 7:30. Next time you need to plan better. I will give you grace and type it real quick this morning but from now on, if you don't give it to me a couple of days beforehand, I will not do it." Child: "Okay, mom. Thanks so much! I am sorry I didn't do this last night." Me: "No problem. We are just both blessed that God prompted me to do things earlier than I normally do them in the morning so I have extra time today. And please don't do this again." Then I sat down typed the paper quickly and he proofed it and off everyone when to school - just a little rushed, but with smiles. Paper in hand - lesson learned.

Imagine this: This morning at 7:00 am one of my kids asked me if I had typed their paper. I say quite loudly in an irritated tone: "Did you give it to me yesterday?" Child: "No!" Me: "Then of course I don't have it done. Why did you even ask me if typed it when you know you didn't give it to me? You just asked to me make feel guilty and now I do. You should have given it to me yesterday!!! Give me the paper! Don't ask me again at the last minute like this! You should have planned better." Child: "Just forget it." Me: "It is due today." Child: "I know!! Maybe I can just get it done by the end of the day." Me: "I can't type it if you don't give it to me. Get it now. I will do it this time but I WILL NOT DO IT next time if you don't get it to me earlier!" Then I sat down and typed the paper quickly. It really didn't take all that long. He proofed it and off everyone when to school - feeling the weight of mommy's aggravation and lack of grace. Paper in hand - lesson learned.

Wow! I don't have to imagine scenario 2. I lived it this morning. Was it aggravating to be asked if I had typed this paper? Yes. Is that normal? Yes. Should I have been asked a couple of days ago? Yes. Was irresponsible behavior being shown? Yes. Was blame trying to be put wrongly on me? Yes. Should there be consequences for such behavior? Yes. Are there issues that need to be discussed? Yes. Were the "Words of my mouth His arms of compassion' ? Absolutely not!

Oh man!!! I apologized to my child for my anger and frustration as everyone left for school. BUT... My heart longed for scenario #1. Why did I not do that? God had cleared my schedule just like I said. I really could have done it exactly like scenario 1. EASILY! At the end of each scenario, the paper was typed and a lesson was learned about next time. BUT.... one with grace, one without grace.

With sadness on my heart, I headed out to run. I listened to "Speak Life" and was sad when I heard the line I want to live. "Oh, Father I am so sorry that the words of my mouth were not Your arms of compassion. Father, forgive me!" My Father: "You are forgiven!" Me: "Oh Father, I messed up." My Father: "Yes, Rebekah you did. I love you anyway!" Me: "Oh Father, I wish I could go back and do it right. But I can't! :-(" My Father: "No, my dear Rebekah, You don't get a redo on this morning. BUT... My mercies are new every morning so you get a new start!" Me: "Sorry I missed a chance to show all my kids what your grace looks like." My Father: "You are forgiven! Tell them today after school that you messed up. Tell them what you wish you would have done. They can still see Me in it. Teach them through this example that they will mess up too but that we don't quit. We seize the next moment to show grace and love. I love you!" Me: "I love you too, Father. Thanks for your new mercies. Sorry I need them so much."

That was my morning run today. God and I talked. I am so glad His mercies are new every morning. It's not so hard "to imagine the words of my mouth as His arms of compassion" when I get a hug from Him while I walk. I failed! I failed big time. Can't ignore the failure or make it look pretty but I can grab His new mercies and starting handing them out. Can't wait to talk to my kids when they get home. Confession is good for the soul and a chance to see mistakes, apologies and forgiveness is good for my kids.

"Need me to type your paper? Sure, no problem! Give it here. It's due in two days, right?" :-)

Psalm 19:14 "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight. Oh Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer."

Lamentations 3:22-23 "The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning."

Proverbs 12

Wow! There is a lot in today's Proverb, check out these verses:
4 A wife of noble character is her husband's crown,
but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

15 The way of a fool seems right to him,
but a wise man listens to advice.

16 A fool shows his annoyance at once,
but a prudent man overlooks an insult.

18 Reckless words pierce like a sword,
but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

25 An anxious heart weighs a man down,
but a kind word cheers him up.

May I shred any moment when my actions/behavior could be disgraceful to Wayne. Help me to be his crown, not decay in his bones! What a treasure to get to be Wayne's wife. Thank you, Lord. Maybe I make YOU and Wayne proud.

How easy it is to show our annoyance, rather than give someone the benefit of the doubt and overlook something. May I shred the tendency not to give other's the benefit of the doubt! We incorrectly operate under the premise that it is all about us - it is not so give other's a break by not assuming the worst. Operate from love, not spite!

The words we choose to say is a recurring them in Proverbs. We like to pretend we can't control them, but we can - if we choose to! May I continue shredding the habit of bad word choice - I want to bring healing, not pierce people like a sword.

A kind word cheers others up. How simple! How easy! Who can I cheer up? Help me shred the habit of being oblivious of chances to cheer others up!

Appetites

The appetites you feed are the ones that you crave...
feed self lots of sweets, crave more sweets
feed self lots fruit, crave more fruit
feed your self on time at the Savior's feet, crave more time at the Savior's Feet

starve yourself of sweets, crave less sweets
starve yourself of your Saviour, crave less of HIM.

What are you eating? Physically and Spiritually this is so true.

I need to starve myself of diet drinks and spend LOTS of time at the Savior's feet!